
He lost his kink over our trauma. I lost my ability to feel free with others too. I am terrified of hurting people even with clear communication. I am unable to be free sexually. I accepted him without his kink. I would have adjusted to meet his needs too because he was worth it to me. He left me because he couldn’t see how we could have peace with his kink gone. I don’t feel accepted for my choices either. We lost our way and it seems we cannot develop a new way.
This is the way of relationships. We change and grow and learn. We endeavor to pick partners who value us and want to grow actively with us because of love. We fucked us up. I am so sad that growth potential was damaged…lost.
I hate what is lost.
I hate that the way is blocked.
I feel…
so much.