Sapiophile: One of my strongest sexual drivers is intelligence. I define intelligence in a lot of ways. I don’t need traditional book smarts, although I like it. I am attracted to minds that are bendy, hungry to learn, problem solve in an uncommon way. I lean toward demisexual also – meaning I appreciate high level emotional connection.
As I look across my most powerful connections, they all fall into this category – emotionally charged intellectual bonds. Fun, intense people, with old souls and calm loving hearts are my absolute kryptonite. Start any conversation with, “you know what I have been thinking about trying…” and I am all in.
Here is the trick. Those connections form deeply. They are a true test to the idea that I can be good to multiple people. They are not casual connections. They require attention and care, and with that investment comes huge risk.
Let’s just say, I am thankful that hearts are resilient muscles…
I love deeply.
I love freely.
This vulnerability kicks my ass regularly.
But, the bonds forged and rewards won in this particular path are so worth while. I have been seen for myself in a way that I have never had in my entire life. I strongly believe this is mostly about my knowing who I am combined with my willingness to own my own desires rather than living in a constant state of deferring to please others.
Find the labels that work for you. Shed the ones that others assign you. Feel free to make adjustments to definitions to reflect necessary nuance you feel in your soul. Allow yourself growth and change as labels do not have to be permanent. I am willing to do the work, open up my heart and my eyes, and allow myself to be happy. I am a demisexual sapiophile for as long as it resonates deeply.