This is where I left off, from Thought Experiment: Round 1: “Dick pics – they are an odd method of saying HI.”
The last time I dated, there was no electronic component. I am sure it existed of course, I just didn’t know about it. The very first conversation I had on the dating platform went like this:
- Dude: Hey sexy. Wanna chat on KIK?
- Me: What is KIK?
- Dude: LOL…messaging app. Find me there @USERNAME.
- Me: (sigh, researches app, downloads app, makes profile and deals with notifications/settings/privacy concerns and then figures out how to find @USERNAME)
- Me: (In brand new KIK) Hi! How are you? Am I in the right place?
- Dude: (LARGE DICK PICTURE)
- Me: Ummmmmm, I don’t think we are in Kansas anymore….
So from there on, I learned to make small adjustment to my communication standard. I meet a man in main platform, I suggest the anonymous chatting app for the larger “get to know us” conversations, but the first message is “Hi, thanks for sending me a message, and I am happy to get to know you here…but if you send me a dick pic unsolicited, the conversation ends and I block you.”
If the response is something along the lines of “LOL, I never send dick pics,” then it is more likely we are a potential match. More often than not, the next exchange is a dick pic. I have found that a rule isn’t a rule unless broken and punished, so I fire back with a dick pic of my own that looks like antibiotics may be required and THEN I wish them peace on the journey and block them.
I have since learned to view the dick pic as something very different. Sometimes I feel pictures as an expression of mutual risk. For deeper connections, the pictures absolutely help fill in the space between meeting or across larger divides. Dick pics though, should never be used to say “hi.”
Welcome to dating in the current world. I have seen more dick in the last year than in my entire life combined previously. The majority of that was unsolicited.
I am a sapiophile. This label is one I came to in the last year as well. Next blog post on that world, because it is very true for me. I give zero fux about your photo…until I do. Once you are in my head, I know everything as a whole.